January 30, 2011

A Drama Llama Visited my House

Why isn't this easier? You love someone. You plan your life. They leave you. They meet someone else.

Shouldn't I just be able to move on? Shouldn't I just be able to just turn this off? What does it mean that I haven't?

While I feel like I am a little more angry, a little more bitter, and quite a bit more cynical about love and relationships, the one person I have longed for for the past 78 days, I continue to long for today.

And getting a phone call yesterday - one that I wasn't expecting or anticipating, doesn't help. It left me feeling a bit like I had been ambushed. So, I did what I'm not supposed to do....I initiated contact again.

And found out....they broke up. Because he got what he said he wanted....everything I wasn't....and she turned out to be crazy. And oddly, it doesn't make me happy (honestly, not even a little).

And we talked for about an hour. (I know, I know....forgive me, I'm human) I'm shocked at how comfortable it was. I'm shocked that I cried and I was angry. I'm shocked at what I took away from it.....but that's for a later post.

I write this for you, ever the optimist....the world will make sense again. I will get my happy ending....just not sure who with.

Hope you enjoyed your trip to MollyWood!

1 comment:

Rebecca said...

You just have to do what's best for you. And sometimes, you don't know what it is - until you're in the thick of something; and only then, do you know if what you wanted - was really what you wanted after all....